The Earth

We've all learned from basic science the three layers of the Earth - the crust, the mantle and the core. Many geologists believe that as the Earth cooled the heavier, denser materials sank to the center and the lighter materials rose to the top. Because of this, the crust is made of the lightest materials (rock- basalts and granites) and the core consists of heavy metals (nickel and iron).

The crust of the Earth is broken into many pieces called plates. The plates "float" on the soft, plastic mantle which is located below the crust. These plates usually move along smoothly but sometimes they stick and build up pressure. The pressure builds and the rock bends until it snaps. When this occurs an Earthquake is the result! 
(Source: http://volcano.oregonstate.edu/vwdocs/vwlessons/lessons/Earths_layers/)

Yep, that's Mother Earth. She has a lot in common with my own mother. The crust is what I see of her. The mantle is her motherly instinct of keeping the core deep under by avoiding serious talks and just seeming self-absorbed. The core is her circumstances. 

The sad part is that I was too focused on the crust on which I live. I was too focused on the earthquakes and how they affect me. I never took the chance to understand the whole being of the Earth. You see, hidden under that thin crust and that very thick mantle is the core. These are my mother's circumstances. I realized that I may never have cared enough to understand what's going on deep below what I see. As of the moment, my greatest regret is having thought of my mother as the antagonist of my life.

She burst out last night. She told me some really nasty things about myself and how I've been acting up. They hit me hard. But I thought I needed to hear that. Now, she's still mad at me and I'm very sorry about giving her a hard time. I just hope she forgives me. My mother has been through a lot and I ought to try and understand that core. 

It took me a heartbreak to realize that we all have different circumstances. Don't let it happen to you. After all those tears, I ended up blaming my own selfishness. I've known for so long how selfish I am, so I try to fight it every single time. It's not enough to scare it off, though. I'd have to defeat it and see it dead. Who knows? This might be the summer that could change my relationship with my mother forever. 

PS. I'm thinking that what happened last night was partly because of my being irritable on the night before the first day of my girl-thing. My mother always falls victim to it. ALWAYS. This too shall pass. And out of all this will come a more understanding daughter and a better mother-daughter relationship like I've always wanted. I just have to take part in making it so.

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At lumipas din :')

Heartbreak is a good teacher.